


Promising Everything I Do Not Mean

by cashcakeplz



Series: Dark Times [1]
Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band)
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Barebacking, Bars and Pubs, Bruises, Concerned!Calum, Concerned!Michael, Crying, Drunk Driving, Drunk!Ashton, Face Slapping, Fighting, Hurt/Comfort, Love, Luke cries a lot, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Rough Sex, Toxic Relationship, Unsafe Sex, abusive!ashton, and ash loves him, ashton calls luke a slut, but he loves ash, im sorry, minor malum, sweet!luke
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-15
Updated: 2016-02-15
Packaged: 2018-05-20 17:05:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6017815
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cashcakeplz/pseuds/cashcakeplz
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I'm sorry, Luke.” He says, because he knows what's about to happen, just like Luke knows what's about to happen, and Michael will too because Calum tells him everything.</p>
<p>It makes Luke sad, not because they all know and none of them will do anything to change it, but because when the sun rises tomorrow, all three of them will pretend it didn't happen. It makes Luke feel empty, but he ignores the feeling, and watches Calum return to his boyfriend with a concerned look.</p>
<p>Or the one where Ashton hurts Luke sometimes, but Luke doesn't mind because he loves Ashton so much that it hurts already. </p>
<p>Based off of "Dark Times" by The Weekend ft. Ed Sheeran</p>
            </blockquote>





	Promising Everything I Do Not Mean

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys!!  
> this is just a one shot, but I have a second part written that I may or may not post!!  
> Anyway, this fic is pretty dark, so PROCEED WITH CAUTION!! I hate making Ash the bad guy, but he fit the bill perfectly!!  
> I hope you guys enjoy, love u all, my beautiful butterflies!!  
> XX-Alex
> 
> P.S. This fic is based off of "Dark Times" and I HIGHLY recommend listening to it whilst reading this!!

Luke feels the hand on his ass before he sees the person it belongs to. 

As soon as he feels it, though, he’s snapping around, pressing his back to the counter, and looking around for whoever it was. The movement might be a little  _ too _ skittish for it to be considered normal, but he doesn’t care. 

He finds the man chuckling to himself, and sipping from a bottle of Budweiser. He’s big, even taller than Luke, and probably twice the width, his chin is covered in an impressive sheen of stubble, and his blue eyes are surprisingly appealing. 

“Woah, there, little bunny. Relax.” The man says in a deep voice. The guys has be around twice Luke’s age, and he’s already giving the blue-eyed boy the creeps. 

“Right.” He says quietly, looking down at his toes for a moment. He doesn’t like looking bigger, scarier, stronger men in the eye, especially when he’s in bars. 

The man laughs again, and steps a hair closer to Luke, and the smaller boy reels back, his nostrils assaulted by the heavy scent of tobacco and day-old clothes. 

“Why so shy, angel?” The man asks, and Luke frowns, glancing at the face of the man. 

“You just touched my ass.” He says softly. He’s not one for confrontation, and he just wants to get away from this man. The man howls with laughter this time, spraying Luke’s face with his beer-breath. 

“Sorry” He laughs. “Pretty hard to walk by  _ that,  _ and not sneak a handful. Hope you don’t mind.” 

Luke rolls his eyes, and turns around, grabbing his drinks quickly. He moves to get past the other man, and he gets in Luke’s way. Luke stops, and looks at him. 

“Excuse me, please.” He says politely. The man furrows his eyebrows, and reaches a hand to stroke down Luke’s cheek. Unable to help himself, Luke flinches backwards, spilling some of one of the drinks in his hands, causing him to scowl. 

“Where you off to, bunny?” The man asks, his breath warm and unpleasant, and much too close for comfort. 

“Away from you.” Luke says, moving to get past the man again, but he won’t budge. Luke feels his chest tighten with panic. 

“That’s awfully rude, don’t you think?” He says, then he runs his knuckles over Luke’s jaw again, the touch undeniably soft. Luke ignores the vomit threatening to surface. “C’mon, bunny, why don’t you humor an old man?” 

Luke scowls, and attempts to push the man off of his smaller body, but he’s heavy, and apparently determined to have a piece of Luke, so he won’t move off. Luke doesn’t know what to do, and is about to panic when-

“Luke, what the fuck are you doing?” 

That’s Ashton, of course it is. Daddy of the band, and Luke’s boyfriend. 

Luke honestly didn’t know if it’s a good thing or a bad thing that Ashton found him. 

“Um-” He says, looking at his older boyfriend, who is standing behind the old man who’s trying to make a move on Luke. Ashton’s gaze darkens, and he steps closer. 

“Hey, buddy.” He says, tapping on the old guy’s back. The man turns around, and Luke breathes a breath of relief at having the huge weight off his chest. The man rounds on Ashton, and Luke should be afraid for Ashton, but all he feels is dread. 

“Can I help you, mate?” The man asks. Ashton quirks an eyebrow. 

“Yeah, you can. That kid you’re crowding there, that’s my boyfriend.” Ashton says. He’s puffing his chest a little bit, making himself seem like a threat to bigger man. All it does is make him seem like a threat to Luke instead. 

“And?” The old man asks. Luke’s stomach twists when he sees Ashton’s eyes flare with anger. He steps in quickly. 

“Hey, Ash, c’mon, let's just go, he’s not worth it.” He says softly, resting his hands on his boyfriend’s shoulders. He can feel the muscle under his fingertips tighten, and he feels fear run through him. Ashton looks down at him with an unsure expression. 

“We’ll go in a minute, after I’m done teaching this asshole a lesson.” He says. Luke can smell the bourbon on his tongue when he talks, can smell the beer he probably sipped on his clothes, and he can almost smell the anger radiating off of him. 

Luke hates when Ashton is drunk. 

“Ash, please. I just wanna go home.” He begs, fisting his hands in Ashton’s shirt. Ashton scowls, and pushes Luke to the side a bit harder than necessary. 

“Shut up Luke, go wait in the car, I’ll be there in a minute.” Ashton says. Luke feels the hurt run through him, feeling the injuries on his heart open just a little bit more at Ashton’s gruff treatment. But, by now he’s used to it, so he back down easily, and stays out of Ashton’s way. He walks away before he can hear the first fist being thrown, knowing it will be Ashton, and knowing that it will hurt, because Ashton punches  _ hard  _ when he’s drunk. 

Luke speaks from experience. 

On his way out to the car, he stumbles right into Calum, who’s giggling with a pool stick in his hands. Calum is obviously drunk, but not drunk enough to be oblivious to the look on his best friend’s face. He stops Luke, and grabs his forearms gently. 

“Hey,” He says, he’s cupping Luke’s jaw, and Luke didn’t realize he was crying until Calum wiped away the drops with his thumbs. “what’s the matter?” 

Luke shakes his head, and steps away from Calum’s hands. Ashton will be  _ pissed  _ is he sees Calum touching him, and Luke figures he’s already in enough trouble as it is. 

“Nothing, I’m fine.” He says quietly. Calum doesn’t believe it, and he tips Luke’s chin up so that he can look into his eyes. 

“Luke, please tell me.” He says softly. Luke sighs. 

“Ashton.” He says in a soft voice. In seconds, Calum seems to be 10 times more sober, and a dark realization settles on his features. 

“Did he hurt you?” Calum asks in a serious tone. Luke shakes his head frantically. He knows Calum will call him on his bluff at home, he’ll see the bruises Ashton is bound to leave on Luke’s frail arms, but right now, Luke doesn’t care. He lies to Calum so that both of them can feel like it isn’t true. 

Calum frowns, and tips his head to look at Luke. 

“Be careful.” He settles for eventually. Luke let's out a breath of relief. He pets Calums arm, and nods. 

“I will be.” He says smoothly. Then, Michael is calling for Calum, and Calum is biting his lip. 

“I'm sorry, Luke.” He says, because he knows what's about to happen, just like Luke knows what's about to happen, and Michael will too because Calum tells him everything. 

It makes Luke sad, not because they all know and none of them will do anything to change it, but because when the sun rises tomorrow, all three of them will pretend it didn't happen. It makes Luke feel empty, but he ignores the feeling, and watches Calum return to his boyfriend with a concerned look. 

He sees Calum lean into Michael, and whisper something to him. Michael frowns, and shakes his head before setting a hand on Calum's shoulder. Calum crosses his arms, and frowns, leaning into Michael. Michael hushes him, and pulls him to his chest, stroking his back and whispering to him gently. 

Luke tries not to feel jealous of their relationship. 

After all, Ashton loves Luke, and he shouldn't be selfish. 

Luke walks to the car through the pouring rain, feeling the liquid seep into his clothes. He frowns slightly, and hurries along to the car that Ashton left unlocked. Luke knows it's unlocked because instead of locking it, Ashton had placed a hand on his thigh and kissed him gently. 

Before he started drinking. 

Luke huddles into the passenger seat, wrapping his arms around himself to try and keep warm. He’ll be waiting for a while anyway. So, he curls up in the seat, and rests his head against the window. He counts the raindrops, and drifts into a slight doze until Ashton returns. 

When he finally does come back, Luke knows it's bad. 

He's rocked from his small nap when the driver's side door slams shut, and Ashton plops down into the chair. He blinks his eyes open slightly, looking over at the older boy. 

Ashton is in his usual drunken state, his movements slack and uncoordinated. Even in the darkness, Luke can see the blood on Ashton's face, can see his split knuckles gripping the steering wheel. 

“Ash?” He asks, uncurling himself, and turning to his boyfriend. Ashton blinks over at him. 

“Luke.” He says slowly, like he's trying to remember how to say Luke's name. Luke wouldn't be surprised. “You look cold.” 

Luke nods slowly. Ashton pulls off his jacket, and sets it on Luke's lap gently. Luke looks at the jacket with surprise, stroking the material gently. 

“Um.” He says slowly. Ashton the a the keys in the ignition, and Luke feels a hair of panic in him. “How'd it go?” 

Ashton snorts, and turns the windshield wipers on. 

“Beat his ass.” He slurs out. “Taught him what happens when people touch what's mine.” 

Luke bites his lip gently, watching Ashton grip the wheel tightly in his fists. 

“Oh.” Luke says softly. Ashton puts the car in drive, and the younger boy surges forward. “Ash, maybe I should drive, you...y-you're drunk.” 

Ashton turns to him, a dangerous light in his eyes. 

“I don't care. My car, I'm driving.” He growls out.

“It's not safe.” Luke says gently. Ashton sighs, and before Luke can even  _ feel  _ scared, a hand is meeting Luke's cheek harshly. 

Luke whimpers quietly, and sits back in his seat, his cheek stinging almost mockingly. 

“You don't tell me what to do, Luke.” Ashton says, pulling the car out of the parking lot. 

Luke nods, and tries not to cry as he watches the bar disappear in the rear view mirror. Good riddance, anyway. He  _ hates  _ the bars Ashton takes him to. They always mean trouble, and a bad night of too-rough sex and bruises. 

“I'm sorry.” Luke whispers as they pull into the driveway of the house they're staying in. It's scary, driving with Ashton when he's drunk, but they have yet to crash, and Luke should just learn to keep his mouth shut. 

That would keep everyone happy. 

“I know.” Ashton says. He puts the car in park, and climbs out of the door. Then he's walking in the rain to Luke's side, and opening Luke's door like a proper gentleman. 

Luke slides out, and wipes his tears quickly, accepting the hand Ashton offers him. Ashton squeezes him a bit too hard like he always does, and leads them through the rain into the house. Ashton pushes Luke into the house, and slams the door shut behind them, making Luke jump a little. 

Luke doesn't mean to be so skittish around his boyfriend, it just sort of happens. He knows it makes Ashton angry when he's drunk, and it just makes him sad when he's sober. Luke can't win. 

“Upstairs.” Ashton grunts out. He's taking off his shoes, and pushing Luke's back a little bit. Luke does as he's told quickly, afraid of making Ashton angry again. He walks up the stairs as quickly as he can manage, and stumbles into his and Ashton's shared room. 

The ground is littered with clothes that have been thrown off in the rush of sex, and Luke spots his favorite shirt, laying on the ground, ripped nearly in half. 

He was so sad when Ashton did that. 

He sits down in the end of the bed, and unlaces his shoes, tossing them to the side. He can hear Ashton puttering around below him, and he starts to feel a little nervous. He strokes his fingers over the silk sheets to calm himself down. He doesn't need to be afraid of Ashton. Ashton is a good man, and he loves Luke, and he keeps him safe from scary men at the bar. 

So what if he blames Luke for when men touch him, or that drinks more than should be possible? 

Ashton  _ loves  _ Luke, and no amount of split lips or bruises will  _ ever  _ convince Luke otherwise. 

Luke is drawn from his thoughts when the door to the bedroom is thrown open. Luke finds he strength not to flinch at the loud noise, and he looks up at Ashton somewhat calmly. 

“Hi, Ash.” He says softly. Ashton steps closer, and Luke can see that he's fixed up his face, wiping away the blood and putting butterfly band aids over some cuts. He still looks mad, though. 

“Why can't you learn, Luke?” He asks. Luke frowns. “Why can't you just act like a normal boy for  _ one night _ instead of slutting around with older men so that I have to save your ass?” 

Luke feels shame work it's way through him, and he lowers his head to look at the floor while shrugging.

“I don't know. I'm sorry, Ashton.” He whispers. Ashton is right. Why can't Luke do anything right? 

“You're  _ sorry _ ?” Ashton mocks. Luke bites his lip, feeling the prickle of tears already. “ _ Sorry _ isn't good enough, Luke.”

He's yelling now, and Luke has to ball his hands into fists to keep himself from crying. 

Ashton hates when he cries. 

“You know, Luke, one of these times, I'm just gonna leave you. I'm gonna  _ let  _ those men have your ass, because you obviously don't care enough to save it for me.” Ashton yells. Luke reels back, and looks up at Ashton, shaking his head. 

“No, Ash, please don't. I do wanna keep it for you, I'm sorry, it...it wasn't m-my fault.” He stutters out. Ashton rolls his eyes, and slaps Luke. It's not very hard, but it burns all the same, and it makes Luke bottom lip tremble. 

Ashton steps to Luke, and squats down, grabbing Luke's chin in his hands. 

“Look at me.” He demands. Luke does, his eyes filled with tears, making his vision blurry. “It  _ was  _ your fault, do you understand me?” 

Luke nods, and a few tears fall from his blue eyes. Ashton looks at the tears with disdain, and wipes them away harshly.

Ashton straightens out, and looks down at Luke.

“Stand up.” He says. Luke does as he's told quickly, and in moments, Ashton's hands are in him, caressing his sides through his shirt. Luke tries to feel like he isn't about to vomit. 

Then, Ashton is pulling Luke's shirt off, and Luke really isn't in the mood, but he knows better than to say no to Ashton. He knows that that just earns him a bruise that will last a week. 

When Luke's shirt is off, Ashton disposes of his own, and shoves Luke down onto the bed. 

“I think,” Ashton says, climbing on top of Luke, and unbuttoning his jeans. “you need to learn who exactly you belong to, Luke.” 

Luke whimpers under Ashton's hands, and bucks his hips a little. He brings his hands to grab at Ashton's wrists, trying to stop him. 

“I do know, Ashy.” He whispers. Ashton shakes his head, and grabs Luke's arms, pinning his down so hard, Luke knows there will be bruises. “You don't.” He growls out. He leans in, and bites at Luke's neck, making the younger boy whine pitifully. “You slut around at bars, so you can't  _ possibly _ know who you belong to.” 

Luke feels some tears slip from his eyes as Ashton's nail dig into his skin. 

“I'm...I'm not a slut.” He whimpers. Ashton growls again, and releases one of Luke's hands. 

“Really?” Ashton asks mockingly. He yanks down Luke's jeans so that they scrape his legs a little bit. Ashton throws Luke's pants behind him, and Luke flinches when they hit the ground. Ashton smirks, and pets down Luke's sides and hips. “Then why are you wearing these?” 

Luke is shaking a little bit as Ashton snaps the elastic band on the panties covering Luke's hips. 

“B-because you like them.” He says helplessly. Ashton shakes his head, and snaps Luke's underwear again. 

“You can't blame everything on me, Luke.” He says. Then he stepping back, and taking off his own jeans and boxers, tossing them away. His cock is already half hard, and Luke probably shouldn't be surprised, but he always is, especially because he's not hard at all. He hopes Ashton won't be upset when he takes off his panties and sees he's still soft. 

Ashton probably won't care if Luke gets pleasure out of this at all. 

“Honestly, I'm tired of you, and your constant irresponsibility.” Ashton growls. He leans back over Luke, and flips him, gripping his hips too harshly in his hands. Luke bites his lip, and arches his back, offering himself to his older boyfriend. 

“That's right, Luke.” Ashton says. He yanks Luke's underwear off his ass, making his cheeks jiggle a little bit. Luke fists his hands tightly in the sheets, and closes his eyes as his eyelashes collect his tears. “Show me your ass. That's the only part of you that matters now, huh? That's what's keeping me around, isn't it?”

Luke led out a wet sob, and he shrugs a little bit. 

“I don't know, Ashy.” He whispers out. Ashton chuckles a little bit, and smacks Luke's ass brutally. Luke jumps, and tightens his hands again, grimacing from the pain. He really doesn't like being spanked, but  _ god  _ if it doesn't get Ashton going. 

“Well, it isn't.” Ashton says. Luke feels his heart skip a beat, and a small smile graces his mouth. He can feel Ashton spreading his cheeks, and probing a spit-wet finger around his hole. 

“No?” Luke asks softly. Ashton hums in confirmation, and pushes a finger into Luke without warning. 

“No. I love everything about you, Lukey.” He says, and his words are  _ so  _ soft that Luke almost doesn't feel the burn from his fingers. 

Almost. 

“I love your lips and your smile.” Ashton says, and he's fucking Luke with his finger now, opening him up. “I love your hair and your voice. I love your laugh, and I love your long legs.” 

Luke is whimpering as Ashton pushes in a second finger, and is turning to a pile of mush as Ashton compliments him. 

“You're so sweet and kind, and you laugh at your own jokes more than we do.” He whispers into Luke's ear. He scissored his fingers, and Luke is just opening right up for him, like a good little boyfriend. 

“I love  _ you _ , Luke.” Ashton says, and then, to Luke's horror, is pulling his fingers out, and is lining his cock up with his hole. “And your tight little ass is just an added bonus.” 

Luke whines, and his back muscles tighten as Ashton grips his hips tight, and gets ready to push in. 

“I...I l-love you too, Ashy-y.” He sobs out right as Ashton pushes into him. 

No matter how many times it happens, Luke is always  _ blown away  _ by how much it fucking  _ hurts  _ to have Ashton enter him without good enough prep. He's shaking within seconds, his ass already burning with the stretch of Ashton inside him. 

“O-oh.” He says in a broken voice, his lip starting to hurt from how hard he's biting it. 

“Yeah?” Ashton mocks, grabbing Luke's hands from where they're fisted in the sheets. He interlaces his fingers with his, and pins them down to the mattress as he starts to works his hips. “Feel my cock in you, Lukey? Does it feel good?”

Luke sniffs before answering. 

“Y-yeah.” He mutters. Tears are streaming down his face, and it's a bit of a lie right now, but he knows that it won't be in a few minutes. 

When the agonizing pain from his ass, and the stinging in his face is gone. 

“That's because you're made for my cock, Luke. Don't you get that?” Ashton whispers in his ear. Luke whines as Ashton fucks him harder, his cock too hard and too dry to be fucking Luke this fast. 

Luke doesn't mean to cry, he doesn't mean to be such a pain for Ashton. He actually really enjoys having sex, and he shouldn’t be acting like a fucking baby. He’s been fucked plenty of times, and he should be used to the burn by now. He shouldn’t complain. He’s been dating Ashton long enough now that he shouldn’t be able to deny sex. 

It’s Ashton’s right now. 

Ashton reminds him of that every time he resists, but only when he’s drunk. Only  _ ever  _ when he’s drunk. 

Luke  _ belongs  _ to Ashton now, and he doesn’t get the choice to be picky over how he’s treated. He’s just grateful that Ashton loves him. 

Luke  _ knows  _ Ashton loves him, he sees it in those hazel eyes the morning after when Ashton apologizes, and when he caresses Luke’s skin like he’s the most beautiful piece of art he’s ever seen. So, Luke can ignore the stranger’s blood that’s staining Ashton’s knuckles as he bruises his boyfriend. He can ignore the words Ashton is whispering in his ear. He can ignore the burn in his ass, and he can ignore the crater in his heart that Ashton tears open a little bit more every night. 

He can ignore it, because Ashton  _ loves  _ him, and more importantly, Luke loves him back, and just because their relationship is twisted doesn’t mean it isn’t real, doesn’t mean that when Ashton tells Luke that he loves him, it’s a lie. 

It just means they’re  _ different _ , and that’s what Luke tells himself in the mornings when Calum stares at his bruises, and when he hears Michael’s voice cut through the house when he argues with Ashton about the bruises. 

Luke tells himself that so he’ll feel a little less empty inside. Ashton can change, and he  _ will _ , Luke knows it’s temporary, and he knows Ashton doesn’t mean it. 

Ashton is under a lot of stress, leading the band, and dealing with his kid of a boyfriend all the time. He has to let his emotion out somewhere, and if it happens to be alcohol, and beating his boyfriend, then so what? 

Luke has  _ chosen  _ that path. He’s gotten into this mess himself, and he doesn’t plan on getting out just yet. Ashton means too much to let go of because of a few bad, alcohol-fueled nights. 

He’ll be strong. He’ll get through this. 

_ They’ll  _ get through this, even if it kills them. 

Luke sobs from the thought, or maybe because Ashton has sped up his thrusts, and his hard cock is dragging against the bed sheets wonderfully. Ashton is pounding him, rough and sloppy, like always when he’s drunk. these nights are usually short and brutal, but Luke doesn’t mind that much. 

Ashton’s cock in him feels good, even if his hands don’t. The tip is nudging Luke’s spot, making the younger boy cry out, and throw his head back in ecstasy. 

“Good.” Ashton pants in his ear. He’s getting faster, and Luke knows he’s getting close already. “You’re a good boy, Luke. You know who you belong to, huh?” 

Luke nods, and swallows as Ashton straightens back up. He slaps Luke’s ass once before gripping his hips, digging his nails into the soft skin harshly, and grunting as he mounts Luke a little bit harder, and shoves into him relentlessly. 

“Yes, Ash, I-I do.” Luke mutters out, his breath coming in short, choppy chunks. His heart is beating too hard, and too fast, feeling like it’s about to burst out of his chest. Ashton is hot and warm, and he smells like alcohol, and he’s  _ hurting  _ Luke with his grip, but Luke can’t find it in himself to care. 

Ashton grunts again, and his hips are leaving marks on Luke’s ass. Luke is whimpering when the older boy grabs a handful of his hair, and pulls him to his chest. 

“Your ass is so damn good, so tight around me, boy.” He says. Luke frowns, but leans back into his boyfriend. Ashton buries his nose in Luke’s neck, and continues to ram him, fucking his ass harder than ever, and biting on the soft skin. 

Luke fists his hands, his stomach twitching from the intensity of the fucking. Ashton pushes him back down, and places his hands on the small of Luke’s back, forcing him down, and fucking him wildly, reaching the edge of his orgasm. 

Luke feels more tears slip out at the rawness of it, and is quiet as Ashton grips him tight, and finishes inside of him. 

“Oh, fuck.” He screams. “Fuck, Luke, so good.” 

Luke pants, grimacing at the feel of Ashton’s cum inside of him. He  _ hates  _ when Ashton doesn’t wear a condom. It leaves him feeling gross, and sticky, and  _ used _ . 

Before Luke can say anything, Ashton is pulling out, giving Luke’s helplessly raw ass a painful little tap. Luke slumps down into the pillows, and shudders softly. 

Ashton’s fingers prod at his hole, and Luke feels disgust roll over him as Ashton wipes some of his cum, which is dripping out of Luke’s exhausted body, off his hole, and strokes it down the back of Luke’s thigh. Ashton pinches the skin there when Luke lets out a whine of protest, and Luke is quick to shut up. 

Ashton takes his hands away, and crawls back up the bed, falling onto his side, and sliding under the covers. 

“I hope you’ve learned now, Luke.” He mutters. Luke is still face-down in the bedding, tears steadily leaking down his reddened cheeks. He can feel a bruise forming on the cheek that Ashton smacked when they were in the car, and a fresh wave of tears joins the first. 

“I have, Ashy.” He says quietly, muffled by the sheets. Ashton nods, and reaches out. Luke flinches away, and Ashton tuts. 

“It’s okay.” He whispers. He pulls Luke to him, and cradles him to his chest. Luke sobs, because Ashton is warm, and he hurt Luke, but god dammit, Luke is so,  _ so  _ in love. Ashton’s face is bruised and bloody, and Luke wonders if it reflects his own. The thought makes his lip tremble, and so Ashton leans over, and kisses him. 

The idea that this is the first time Ashton has kissed him all night makes Luke sad, and he trembles in Ashton’s hands.  

“I love you, Lukey.” Ashton whispers, and he strokes a hand down the thin, protruding bones in Luke’s back. 

“I know.” Luke sniffles. “I-I love you too.” 

Ashton nods, and then lets go of Luke, rolling to his other side, completely disregarding his crying boyfriend. Luke doesn’t mind much, he’s used to the treatment by now, and he rolls onto his other side too, away from the boy he loves so much. 

He ignores his aching body, and with Ashton breathing unsteadily beside him, he coaxes himself into a fitful sleep. 


End file.
